Pain

Pain. It’s one of the few things we can inflict or with hold. It breaks through our walls of numbness, relieving us of the nothingness of shock. If we hurt, we know we are alive.
Is it any wonder so many people are self destructive?
Happiness is fleeting, and can be ruined by those around us. Pain cannot. Others can cause us pain, but if they stop, we can continue it.
It’s easy.
At least the physical pain is. They call it self mutilation, when you cut yourself. But you do it so you can feel….so you can control something, anything.
The emotional pain? That’s trickier. You hate it, you fear losing it. You hurt yourself to help you deal with it.
Anything to avoid facing life’s uncertainties. Because there is no control. In so many ways we are at the mercy of the wind. So we embrace our hated lover, that of pain.
It’s a sick dance we do, to avoid acceptance that control is naught but an illusion.